Walking the “pigs of wealth”

Imagine that managing money was like walking a group of pigs. Each pig has its own personality, all tugging in their own direction.

This tension between push and pull can serve as an apt metaphor for how we balance saving, spending, investing, and giving. Not only for ourselves, but our children too.

Understanding how these “pigs” interact with one another can offer insight into our financial decisions, and help us guide our children in managing their wealth.

But first: let’s meet the pigs, and understand what they reveal about our financial habits, priorities, and legacy.

• The “Save” pig is quiet and steady, a champion of patience and preparation. It prioritises the significance of building a financial safety net, and values peace of mind amongst uncertainty. This pig demonstrates how delayed gratification and careful planning transform small, consistent actions into long-term stability and self-reliance.
• The “Spend” pig operates with a dual nature: the steady “Need” and the impulsive “Want.” One side focuses on essentials like food, housing, and education. The other eagerly pursues indulgences. Managing this pig requires distinguishing between priorities and desires, helping us to make better decisions and understand how discipline and mindfulness can create financial independence (while curbing impulsive tendencies).
• The “Share” pig embodies generosity and the joy of giving, whether through donations, helping friends, or supporting meaningful causes. It highlights the delicate balance between thoughtful giving and financial stability, illustrating how generosity can uplift others while remaining sustainable. When nurtured with care, this pig fosters empathy and a sense of purpose, making a thoughtful, impactful act.
• The “Invest” pig is forward-thinking, always looking to the horizon for growth and opportunity. It introduces concepts like risk, reward, and compounding, making even complex financial ideas approachable. This pig inspires a proactive approach to planning, showing how thoughtful investments today can yield significant rewards in the future.

Together, these pigs show how the emotional and practical sides of money management intertwine.

But keeping them in harmony is no easy feat. How do we avoid letting one pig run wild at the expense of the others? And what does this balance mean for our legacy?

 

What we’re really teaching about money: early lessons in managing the pigs

Children learn about money long before they understand its value. Financial habits aren’t just taught through words — they’re absorbed through observation and experience. From a young age, children notice how their parents handle resources, balance choices, and manage priorities. These early lessons shape how they will manage their own “pigs” — the financial behaviours and decisions they carry into adulthood.

Teaching children about money is about building competence — a mix of technical understanding, emotional intelligence, and a sense of self. As parents, we aim to guide our children from helplessness to independence, teaching them to develop their skills, manage resources, and ultimately recognize their value in what they do rather than simply what they have.

Consistency is key. Mixed messages create confusion and hinder children’s ability to internalise good financial habits.

For example, if a child is saving for something like a toy but pleads for more money, a parent or grandparent might feel compelled to step in and relieve the struggle. While this may seem like an act of kindness, it undermines the lesson of delayed gratification. Children’s understanding of financial principles depends on the consistency of the behaviours they observe, meaning that actions—rather than words—shape lasting values.

It’s important for children to have the opportunity to manage their own “pigs.” Instead of directing how to manage their money, parents can provide children with a set amount to divide between saving, spending, investing, and giving.

Clear boundaries and “rules” help to make this effective. Explain which expenses children are responsible for — like saving for toys or spending on treats — and which larger costs, such as housing or food, remain the parents’ responsibility. This hands-on experience teaches children that spending on one thing often means sacrificing another, fostering a deeper understanding of the trade-offs involved in managing money and the consequences of their decisions.

Mistakes will inevitably happen — but are to be accepted, not criticised. If a child spends all their savings on an impulse purchase and later regrets it, the lesson will be far more impactful than any lecture. These moments create opportunities to reflect on values, decision-making, and consequences. It’s important not to shield children from these lessons but to create a safe space where they can learn from their mistakes and gain confidence in managing their finances responsibly.

Incorporating play can make this process more engaging. Classic games like Monopoly or The Game of Life, budgeting challenges, or digital apps can introduce financial concepts in a fun, interactive way. When learning feels like play, children often stay curious, develop critical thinking, and approach money management as an opportunity rather than a burden.

So, those are the practical aspects. But money is not just a resource—it can symbolize self-worth, success, and status. The key question parents must ask is: What message are we sending about the role of money? Are we teaching children to view wealth as a tool for opportunity and independence, or are we inadvertently promoting wealth as the ultimate goal?

After all, children are constantly observing — not just to learn how to manage finances, but to understand what money truly represents. How parents save, spend, invest, and give has an impact that far outlasts any explicit lesson.

 

Generational dynamics: who holds the leash?

In every family, the same question eventually arrives: who holds the leash? To start, the answer is clear—parents make financial decisions, set rules, and maintain control. As children grow, the balance shifts. They test boundaries, assert their independence, and start making their own choices. This transition from dependence to competence is crucial, yet often comes with tension.

How, then, can parents strike the right balance between protection and freedom? Too much control can foster resentment and stifle confidence. Too little can lead to poor decisions and missed opportunities for growth. Gradually giving children freedom to manage their money sends a powerful message: We trust you to learn, grow, and take responsibility. This trust helps children move from passive recipients of wealth to active stewards of their financial future.

Equipping them with the right tools and knowledge is essential in this transition. Introducing basic financial concepts, discussing goals, and sharing practical skills like budgeting and saving ensures they have a strong foundation. As they grow more mature, offering schematic insights into the family’s broader financial picture—assets, investments, and spending—through tools like our Family Wealth Navigator can deepen their understanding. Even without exact amounts, these overviews help children grasp the structure of the family’s wealth and spending allocations. This combination of trust, preparation, and transparency empowers them to navigate their financial journey with greater confidence and clarity.

Parents play a dual role: protectors of the relationship and coaches in this process. Through clear boundaries, active encouragement, and lessons in perseverance, children can develop confidence and competence without losing trust or connection. This partnership is about walking together, with parents initially leading and gradually stepping back as children gain the tools to navigate their financial and emotional landscapes independently.

As children grow older, it’s important to involve them in meaningful financial discussions. By explaining financial decisions—why saving for a family vacation takes precedence over a spontaneous purchase—parents can help children understand the thought process behind managing money and prioritizing goals. These conversations help children see wealth not as a tool for personal gain, but as a resource to serve a greater purpose.

This gradual shift in responsibility requires patience and consistency. Financial lessons cannot be fully realised without a steady, predictable approach. For younger children, it might begin with small decisions, like dividing an allowance into spending, saving, and giving categories. As they grow older, they can take on more significant tasks, such as managing a personal budget, saving for larger purchases, or learning the basics of investing. By their teenage years, they should be actively managing their pigs under guidance, preparing for adulthood and financial independence.

To support this progression, families can leverage wealth planning tools that promote financial literacy and practical skills. Structures like a family bank or investment committee can help children understand the investment cycle and decision-making processes. Mentorship programs, fiduciary planning tools, and governance systems provide platforms for the next generation to engage with the management of business and financial assets. These tools not only enhance financial knowledge but also instil a sense of responsibility, preparing children to become capable stewards of family wealth.

The question of who holds the leash is about partnership, not control. This partnership is shaped by how reliably parents model financial responsibility. The way parents manage money, save, give, and prioritise financial goals offers silent lessons that children naturally absorb over time. These behaviours set a foundation for how financial values are understood and carried forward.

A balanced approach to money is key. If children are given just enough to cover their needs or what falls within their allowance, they may only learn that money comes in and goes out, missing the concepts of abundance and saving. On the other hand, if the focus is solely on saving, they might miss how money enables experiences and the importance of flow and circulation. Allowing them to experience a mix of spending, saving, investing, and giving helps them understand money holistically — as a tool for both security and opportunity.

It’s important to distinguish between healthy struggles — learning to work within limits, delaying gratification, and making trade-offs — and outright deprivation. Frugality and boundaries may teach discipline, but deprivation can deny children the opportunity to engage meaningfully with money. Encouraging children to earn, save, and share their own money — not just their parents’ — fosters a sense of ownership and responsibility.

As part of this process, parents may occasionally allow more spending on “wants.” When this happens, explaining the reasoning behind it — such as years of sacrificing wants to achieve long-term goals — helps children understand the concept of delayed gratification. It shows that financial discipline can lead to moments of greater freedom and choice. Financial education, then, is a shared responsibility — passed down and refined across generations. By working together, families can create a wealth plan that not only ensures financial stability but also fosters the values, principles, and independence needed for the next generation to thrive.

 

Walking toward freedom: a journey made together

Financial education isn’t just for children — it’s for parents too. As we guide our children, they challenge us to refine our own relationship with wealth. Walking these pigs becomes a shared experience that deepens our understanding of wealth’s role in our lives.

Wealth, at its best, is not about accumulation. It’s a tool for creating opportunities, fostering relationships, and achieving meaningful goals. Ask yourself: What kind of wealth owners do I want my children to become? What kind of pigs will they inherit, and which ones will they learn to manage themselves? These questions lead to freedom — not found in wealth itself, but in how it enables us to create a lasting impact.

Financial education teaches children to manage their “pigs of wealth” with independence and purpose. By guiding them to balance saving, spending, investing, and giving, we help them build a future where wealth reflects their values. True freedom lies not in what we have, but in how we choose to use it.

 

Questions to reflect: what lessons are we teaching?

1. What financial values do I want my children to learn? How do I model these in my spending, saving, and giving habits?
2. Am I giving my children the tools, knowledge, and opportunities to manage their own pigs? Am I allowing them to make decisions, learn from their mistakes, and gain confidence and independence in handling their financial priorities?
3. How do I balance providing financial support with encouraging independence? How do we align extended family generosity with the lessons we teach?
4. When making financial decisions, do I explain my reasoning to my children, use everyday choices as teaching opportunities, and ensure the messages I send are consistent?
5. How can I create a safe space for open communication about money? How can I encourage my children to ask questions, express concerns, share their financial experiences, and learn from their mistakes?